Fitness,  Motivation

The Fear Of The Gym- Overcoming Yourself

If you’re like me, and I know there are those of you out there, then you are probably terrified of going to the gym. You want to be more active, you want to lose weight, but there is something holding you back. The fear of the gym doesn’t have to be so scary.

There are lots of factors coming into play that jumble around in your head. Our families, wants, desires, guilty pleasures. Society, I think has a big role in it. I think we’ve grown up expecting or thinking we’re supposed to look a certain way and that influences a lot of our decisions. If that is why you’re here, please stop for a minute. My site was never to encourage you to change yourself for other people. I want you to change yourself because you have decided that you want to be healthier, be a better version of you, to be comfortable with yourself because that’s what you want.

That is my rant and now these are topics to help you realize you’re not alone in this. I’ve been through it, and others have as well. I hope you can take this knowledge and push forward to achieving the life you’ve always wanted.


A common reaction to doing something new is to be intimidated. When you walk into a gym knowing nothing and you see bulked out men pumping iron or fit women doing complex work outs, you get kind of side tracked and lost in it all. You tend to just mosey on over to the tread mill or the bikes and try to see what every one else is doing or summon the courage to go look at the machines and weights. I know.

I’ve said it before. Strength and skill comes with time and patience. No one starts out being good at working out and no one saw results right away. So if you summon the courage to go try lifting something don’t worry about how much it is you’re lifting. I actually recommend starting with low weight until you figure out what you’re doing. That way you don’t hurt yourself.

I was also worried that people would know I was new and didn’t know what I was doing. I will say two things to this:

1. You shouldn’t be worrying about what everyone else thinks. You are there for you.

2. Similar to one, everyone else there, is there for themselves. To improve themselves and reach their goals. They’re not worried about you.

We are so worried about being judged that we let small or even nonexistent things get in our way. Don’t let anything get in your way. If you want to learn something, do it. No matter what people may or may not think. You will never go anywhere or get better if you don’t push yourself. You will never grow if you don’t put yourself in uncomfortable situations.



I have always been competitive. At some point in my life it got really bad. I wouldn’t participate in anything if I had never done it before or knew I wasn’t good at it. I hated losing and not being up to par. I would rather practice at something in private until I got good at it and then go and participate with other people. That is no way to live.

I was embarrassed when I would go into the gym and try to lift weights. I was not strong at all. I felt like I should be able to lift more, and have better form than what I had. Listen, it took me awhile to realize that you have to start somewhere. Get this through your head now and you will save yourself time, stress, and energy. It’s okay that you don’t know what you’re doing and that you can’t lift like everyone else.

Get in there and learn. The only way you’ll get better is to jump right in and do it.



If you have friends who want to go to the gym or already go, that is great! It is easier to go with someone and either learn together or have them teach you. Having someone encourage you and vice versa is a powerful motivator. An accountability partner is sometimes even crucial for success. It leaves you no room to cop out of something for weak excuses. You’ll want to make lots of excuses for yourself as to why you can’t do somethings. Believe me.

The friends I had lived hours away from me in other states. So, when I first started I didn’t want to go to the gym alone. I wanted someone who kind of knew what they were doing to show me what to do. I met a few people at the gym who helped me learn or I did some work outs with. Just to get a feel of what to do. The experience you will gain in the long term of having someone who is experienced will be invaluable.



The number one factor it comes down to is you. You are the only thing holding you back. No one is making you not be more active or going to the gym. The fear you feel comes from with in. No one has said anything to you at the gym or looked down on you (I hope). It is all in your head.

I know this is a clique abundantly and will be said repeatedly forever, but life is short. If you want to do something, what are you waiting for? Those people in the gym are either strangers you’ll never get to know or see again, or you will form lasting and learning relationships with them. Either way, why are you letting the opinions they haven’t even voiced to you weigh you down and prevent you from learning? It is time you took control over your life.


At the End of the Day

If you want something go get it. If you want to lose weight but your friends, family or boyfriend make comments that end up making you feel stuck, try your best to push past them. Because once you see the world beyond the comments you’re going to realize you have a powerful voice and passion to scream out. It doesn’t matter if anyone else is listening as long as you’re living the life you want to live.

Find the passion and faith in yourself to try something new. It may be scary but finding that urgency and desire in yourself will far outweigh everything else. Be brave. Conquer the world by putting your foot down on it. Claim a portion of it for you and make it yours.

If you’ve thought along a similar path, let us know in the comments below about what you’ve experienced!




Disclaimer: I am not a doctor or a dietician. The information I provide is based on my personal experience, and scientific studies. Any recommendations I may make about weight training, nutrition, supplements or lifestyle, or information provided to you through email or on this website should be discussed between you and your doctor because working out involves risks. The information you receive in our emails, programs, services and products do not take the place of professional medical advice.


  • Tamika Mosby

    I love how you put everything together in the article. I used to be afraid of going to they gym but now I crush it.

    Thank you for the motivation.

    • Aurelia

      Hi Tamika,

      I am glad you loved the article! I used to be terrified as well, so I am happy you found this motivational! I am building a community page for people to post questions, stories, and ways to motivate others. I would love if you wanted to share something in that forum that would help others find that confidence!
      Continue to crush it in the gym!


  • Scott

    Great post. I’ve been lifting weights for about 3 decades, and I’ve been to a lot of gyms. I can tell you that most people are so interested in themselves that they aren’t paying as much attention to you as it seems. Also, in my experience, most of the people you meet in the gym are very nice and willing to help you out. Sure, there are some jerks. But you’re going to get that anywhere you go.

    Keep pushing forward and enjoy yourself.

    • Aurelia

      Hi Scott!

      Thanks for your comment. I agree. It takes a lot of focus and mental preparedness to go the gym and crush your work out. So most people aren’t thinking about what you’re doing or how you’re doing it. Of course, unless you’re doing something really bizarre. I’m sure we’ve all seen those videos on social media where someone is using weights or a machine in a way we never would have thought of! They make me laugh and cringe at the same time.
      Anyways, thanks for checking out my site!


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